The Source of Brokenness in Marriages

There is no estate to which Satan is more opposed as to marriage.

Martin Luther

““Who told you that you were naked?” the LORD God asked.  “Have you eaten from the tree whose fruit I commanded you not to eat?””

Genesis 3:11, NLT

What a vital question by God to Adam and Eve.

Let’s back up.  The question comes at the end of the Fall of Man.

In Genesis 3:11, sin enters the world after Adam and Eve have taken a bite out of the fruit, thus disobeying God.  Adam and Eve hid from God, and God asked Adam, “who told you that you were naked?”  Think about that question for a minute.  We must listen to God and not to others.

Satan convinced Adam and Eve to take a bite of fruit from the tree of knowledge of good and evil.

But the Lord God warned him, “You may freely eat the fruit of every tree in the garden—except the tree of the knowledge of good and evil.  If you eat its fruit, you are sure to die.”

Genesis 2:16–17, NLT

You may tell yourself how stupid and naïve Adam and Eve were or that you will never fall for that lie.  Be careful making assumptions.   Because you may not be tempted as Adam and Eve were in their marriage but rest assured you will be tempted.

And remember, when you are being tempted, do not say, “God is tempting me.” God is never tempted to do wrong, and he never tempts anyone else.  Temptation comes from our own desires, which entice us and drag us away.  These desires give birth to sinful actions.  And when sin is allowed to grow, it gives birth to death.

James 1:13–15, NLT

Some are tempted in their thoughts.

Some are tempted in their viewing.

Some are tempted in their talk.

Regardless of who you are, you can rest assured if you are breathing, you will be tempted.  You will be tempted to listen to voices other than the Lord’s.

One of the hardest things to do in your marriage and life is to keep yourself in a position to listen to God.  Satan and the world do not want you to have a happy marriage.  In fact, Satan and the world want you constantly looking for something better, an upgrade.

In his book Scared Marriage, Gary Thomas states, “What if God designed marriage to make us holy more than to make us happy?”  God is more interested in your holiness than your happiness.  Therefore, Satan will tempt you to focus on happiness rather than holiness.

So what do you do?

Position yourself to hear from the Lord.  Regardless of what condition or state your marriage is in right now, you must fix your eyes on the Lord and allow him to guide you.  How do you do that?  You set aside time each day to read God’s Word, reflect on God’s Word, and pray God’s Word.

Read God’s Word – I would recommend a Bible Reading Plan that helps you to read through the entire Bible or specific themes in the Bible.

Reflect on God’s Word – I would encourage you to write down anything that stuck out to you from your Bible Reading and why it stuck out to you.

Pray God’s Word – Close out your time with the Lord, praying that He will use the Word He gave you in a powerful way to transform you into the person he wants you to be.

The source of broken marriages is lies from Satan.  The way that we get those lies out of our lives is to replace them with the truth from God’s Word.

The best protection against Satan’s lies is to know God’s truth.


The more you love God, the more you will love your spouse.  However, the opposite is not true.

Dr. Draper Rogers is a pastor with Gardendale First Baptist Church and a contributor to North Jefferson Magazine.